EMOTIONS

The Chinese saying goes like this... a hundred years of good deeds begets a shared boat ride, a thousand years of good deeds begets a night's sleep in a shared bed. It's to describe how precious it is to find someone to share one's life with.

I've been going for MPC aka marriage prep course with Charlie Brown, it came as a surprise to many, maybe even to myself. We've been together for 6 months.

It's interesting - the things we learnt during the class, I realised how emotionally handicapped I am - I had difficulty expressing my emotions and feeling. It's extremely difficult for me to simply express how I feel in an amicable, neutral yet unblaming (if there's such a word), I was either too detached, or overly involved, crying and shouting while trying to express my emotions. Perhaps I knew abt this handicap of mine long ago - the fact that I hate to manage conflicts, and when I am angry, I do not speak of how I feel, instead I just cry, unable to describe or explain how I feel and why I feel that way.

So there, instead of being a cg leader who is supposed to be able to connect with members' emotions, I have problems managing mine.